Parenting and What Not

I break this blogging silence to stand on my soapbox once again. Earlier this week I had a friend/family member make an innocent comment on a mutual facebook friend's status. I understood why it was being made and really didn't think much of it. However, apparently another member of the extended family we've both married into did, and was highly rude in her comments to my friend. It made me realized that I have an official opinion for ALL seemingly controversial parenting topics of our generation. And my official opinion is this:
Pray for what is right for your specific child at that particular time. Then do what you are told to do.

Too often we are quick to judge others who make parenting decisions different from our own. However, we seldom know all of the reasons those decisions are made and are certainly not in on discussions between Heavenly Father and the parent about these decisions. I, myself, have received answers that others didn't understand and judged me for because they didn't have all of the facts and didn't have the right to receive revelation for me the way I do for myself. Who are we to think that we have to right to decide what is right for someone else? Ugh, this compulsive need for superiority in this generation just disgusts me. Do your best, get your own answers, follow those answers and allow others to do the same without acting like a condescending jerk. That is all...

***

Now that I've gotten that frustration out, we are about ready for the Christmas holidays here. I am still working on my Personal Progress after a hiatus. I am VERY MUCH looking forward to welcoming in 2014. This year was very hard on me physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually. I am looking forward to the feeling of starting fresh and making 2014 a very awesome year. We have plans already for Spring Break and in the summer that we're really looking forward to. Plus, 2014 will bring with it the baptism of our oldest child, who will turn 8 at the end of September and also be starting Cub Scouts. Lots of exciting things to look forward to. But before that, I'm going to take a deep breath and plug through the very busy week and a half I have ahead of me :)

64 Years Minus 29 Days

64 years minus 29 days. That is how long my grandparents' marriage on earth was. That number is just mind blowing to me. I will never reach that with John, unless by some miracle he lives to be 93. The moment at my grandma's funeral that made me cry the most was my grandpa leaning over to kiss the box containing my grandma's ashes. It was one of the most sweet and most heartbreaking things I've ever seen in my life. 6 weeks and a day after my grandma left my grandpa, he was reunited with her. A love that stood through decades and decades continues on. With that said, I'm off to pack for yet another funeral...

Nikki's Personal Progress 2.0

Last week I sat down and thought to myself "when was the last time I felt happy on a regular basis?". I tend to struggle to be happy this time every year. As winter starts to come upon us, I feel miserable more than any other time of the year. As I went through past October blog posts, I realized there was one year where I wasn't struggling in October. It was the year that I was working on my Personal Progress. I was so focused on growing in my testimony and relearning things about Heavenly Father that the lack of sunlight and loss of warm weather didn't really seem to affect me. So last week I decided that the time has come to start working on Personal Progress again. I got a new book from our ward's Young Woman president, who sounded really excited that I wanted to work on it again so soon after completing it (May 2012). That means it's only been about 17 months, and even less since I finished earning my Honor Bee. But I am recognizing the importance of the program and the good that I know it can do in my life.

I started working on it on Friday. I will be working on 1 value experience, 1 value project and the Virtue value project at pretty much any given time. I will focus on 1 value at a time, instead of jumping all over the place. I decided to start at the beginning with Faith. Already, I feel so much love for this program and I feel so much more peace in my heart. I am very much looking forward to learning, relearning and growing closer to my Heavenly Father.

Babysitting...

I saw this thing on facebook about what is fair to pay your teenage babysitter, and it actually got me pretty riled up. Do we really treat our babysitters like doormats who should just be grateful for whatever scraps we give them. I don't expect a lot of extras from anyone watching my kids. I don't expect them to put my kids to bed, because they don't go to bed easily. I don't expect them to make any food, if they are watching my kids during a meal then I provide them with a decent meal (we usually have ordered pizza that is delivered just before we leave). I don't expect them to clean what they came into, I just ask that my house isn't much worse off than I left it. I don't expect them to do the dishes, I just ask that they be moved to the sink.

However, I AM asking that you make sure that my child hasn't terrorized my house or beaten up their brother, which they probably try to do many times while you're there. I AM asking you to make sure that my child hasn't choked on their meal and EXPECTING you to know what to do if that happens. If my child vomits or something like that while I'm out, I'm asking you to CARE for them for the 20 minutes (minimum) it will take me to get back home (and trust me, I'm feeling your pain if you had to watch someone puke). I AM asking you to try and convince my child to clean up after themselves as they are playing, which I will be the first to admit is not an easy task. And let's face it, I take care of my kids for nothing because they are my kids and I love them. It's a whole different level for me than what I'm asking of you. I'll be the first to admit that my kids are a lot of work to take care of AT THE BEST OF TIMES! For babysitters the kids are extra wound up, and for teens who aren't responsible for that kind of exhausting exuberance on a daily basis it is A LOT to deal with. Those teens often wear themselves right out to provide this service for me.

So the conclusion I came to is this. You need to look at ALL of the factors before deciding on a price together with your babysitter that you both find fair, before they actually babysit. If you can't come to an agreement on what is fair, find another sitter. If you can't afford to pay what your babysitter deserves, try explaining the situation to them and see if they're willing to renegotiate. If you STILL can't afford a teen babysitter, try asking other family to watch your kids. Or ask a friend if they are willing to swap watching kids with you, so that there's no money exchanged, but you're both still getting something for your service. And if you can't do any of that, then you make a sacrifice as a parent and stay at home instead of going out.

John and I RARELY go out on dates because we can't afford to do a lot at this point in our lives. When we do go out, my dad watches our kids, because I recognize that I'm not a a point where I can afford to pay a babysitter what they deserve for watching my boys. So we do date nights of games or movies at home. It's a sacrifice that we willingly make to be parents to our awesome boys. We recognize that if we didn't have my dad to watch our kids, we would pretty much never go out. In becoming parents, we made the choice to put our kids ahead of lots of movie at the theater nights or dinners out together.

I'm not saying parents should never go out, I'm just saying that parents should find a way to go out and still be respectful of exactly what it is they're asking someone to do while taking care of their children. I rarely say no if I'm asked to watch a friend's kids (always free, with one exception), and if I say no there is a highly valid reason for it (like my kids or I are sick or we already have something going on that would interfere with me giving their child proper attention). I'm sure there are other people out there who would be just as willing to watch your kids for you for free a couple of times a year for a few hours if you really can't afford a teen babysitter.

And remember, as a teen, giving up your free time is a huge sacrifice, so make sure that those teens are properly blessed for the sacrifice they are making. They have a LOT more homework than we did, their educational workload is higher than our's was and they need their downtime as well.

So that's the world of babysitting wages according to Nikki...

Autumn and Birthdays

What a long an exhausting week! Caleb enjoyed his birthday and the boys had fun staying at Grandpa's for a couple of nights. On Saturday John took me to Edmonton Expo as an early birthday present and bought me a d20 (that's a 20 sided dice) necklace. We saw some really cool leather work and chain mail work while we were there. I had a few tough moments with being in a place with so many people, but I did a lot better than I'd thought I would, considering I have crowd claustrophobia.

On Sunday I got to take Caleb and Ty to church on my own since John was sick and subbed for Caleb's class. The other 3 kids were awesome, but Caleb never behaves well when I sub in his class.

Brett and I have had head colds this week, but mine's pretty much gone now. I've also been enjoying the beautiful view of autumn weather. It doesn't last for long in E-town, but it sure is gorgeous while it's here. I love the beautiful yellow and orange leaves on the ground.

Not too much else going on here. It's my birthday this Saturday on General Conference weekend. John and I are just going to have some snacks and play some Dungeons & Dragons (I have turned into such a bigger geek than I was before). It should be a nice and (fairly) relaxing weekend. I love autumn :)

Change of Plans

I planned on doing a huge post tomorrow to celebrate Caleb's 7th birthday, but instead I'll be doing the final packing and preparing my house to head out to my grandma's funeral service.

I have taken the news about my grandma a LOT harder than I thought I would. My grandma taught me more about homemaking than anyone else in my life. When I chose to stay at home with my kids, my grandma was my biggest supporter. She understood the joys and frustrations of this better than anyone else in my family and never failed to let me know that I was making a valuable contribution even though I chose to forgo post-secondary education and out-of-home employment.

Grandma was never afraid to speak her mind about what she thought and felt, which is a trait I admire. She loved my boys so much and was always anxious to hear about what they were up to. When Brettley was born she opened her heart to John and I about a painful experience she'd been through so that we'd know that there was someone in the family who understood how terrifying it is to have a premature baby.

Over the past few years my grandma fell victim to Alzheimer's and dementia. In the spring of 2012 she was moved to a care facility when she could no longer walk. It has been a few years since I've seen her, at the request of my mum. I remember my grandma from the time when she remembered that she was my grandma. I have been missing her for a few years now, but now I miss her in a new way. I'm so glad that her struggle is over and that she is herself again and able to remember me and how much I love her. Grandma seldom said it in words that she loved me, but she never failed to show it in her actions.

I love you, Grandma, and I miss you so much!

Settling In To The School Year

Illness has been running around the Bly house the past couple of weeks. Caleb got a head cold that has hung on for about 10 days now. John and I were hit with it as well, so he ended up needing to take 2 days off of work because he was sick. That's kind of a big deal because I can count on 1 hand the amount of days John has taken off of work for his own illness since I met him. I had vertigo for a few days and ended up sleeping for 13 hours last night because I was so wiped out.

Ty has been absolutely loving school and his teacher commented that he's settled down a lot the last 2 days, which was great to hear. Brettley has been enjoying doing preschool things with me, and especially loves singing the songs. Caleb had to miss most of last week's school as well as missing his first piano lesson because he was so sick, but he's very happy to be back at school this week.

This coming Saturday we're celebrating Caleb's birthday (it's next Wednesday). Instead of having a party with his friends, he asked for just our family to go to Chuck-E-Cheese instead. I was very happy with the compromise and am looking forward to seeing the kids have fun playing the games.

I think that's about all that's new, there's just been a lot of resting going on this past week, ha ha.

Back to School

School has started up again, and it's been a great time for our family. Caleb started grade 2 and Ty started Kindergarten. The feelings I've had over the last 2 weeks have been a big topic of discussion in our house, and here, on my own little piece of the internet, I decided to chat about them. I am not a parent who cries when my kids go to school. I don't feel sad. While I notice they aren't here, I don't consciously miss them. So I've been thinking to myself 'Does this make me a bad parent?'. I've come to the conclusion that it doesn't.

I love my kids, they mean more to me than almost anything. They know that I love them, I tell them many times every day and show it in the things I do for them and with them. But when they go to school, it means that they are progressing. They are learning new skills, becoming more independent and becoming their own person. I don't see that as a sad thing. It's exciting. It means that they are doing their job and I'm doing mine. It means that I am helping them become they person that they are meant to be and that's what parenting is all about.

And let's be truthful here for a minute. We enjoy the time apart! Caleb and I have extremely similar personalities. We are highly emotional people who thrive on routine. Summer holidays, Christmas holidays and spring break are horrible for us. Our routine is taken away and we lash out at each other for it. So we love school and during that time we are more appreciative of each other and find it easier to show the other how much they mean to us.

As for Ty, if you happen to know Ty, you know why I'm over the moon that he's finally in school. If you don't know Ty, you are both blessed and cursed. He's one of the most high energy kids I've ever known, but he loves life and is absolutely hilarious. But yeah, a few hours apart gives me a chance to breathe and regroup, which is extremely helpful.

Lastly, with Ty in school in the mornings, I am home with just Brettley and am FINALLY able to give him the 1 on 1 attention he needs to catch up in his development. We have activities to do every day and he enjoys not having to fight with Ty for attention. Then while Brettley naps in the afternoon and I have time with just Ty, who is having a hard time figuring out where he belongs as the middle child. Life right now is really great, and if anyone sees me as a bad mother for enjoying what the school year gives us, then judge away, I have no shame about it :)

New Nephew, New Calling and Fall

My little nephew was born on Monday :) Well, technically he's not my nephew, but I get called Aunt Nikki anyway. He's the sweetest little guy and was so content for the whole time John and I were holding him yesterday.

I can now announce that I have a new calling on the Relief Society board. I'm pretty excited to be going into that calling, I really feel like it's what I need in my life right now.

And yeah, I feel like that's about all that I have to say. It's been a pretty boring week, I've mostly just been reading a lot. I've gone through 4 books now in the last week, and only one of them was a thinner book (213 pages). I am mostly just looking forward to summer holidays being over and getting the kids in school and having a nice routine again for the next 10 months. I'm not a summer person, I definitely prefer spring and fall. So on that note, what part(s) of fall are you looking forward to the most? I'm looking forward to the kids being in school, 3 of us having birthdays, no more crazy summer storms and getting to wear sweaters again.

Forgot Some News...

I skipped some pretty important news yesterday. I guess it's because I've known it in my heart for a couple of months now, so it doesn't seem new to me. We have officially announced that we're done having kids. But wait, you say, you said you were going to have another in a post about 2 years ago. A lot of this has been highly personal and not something that I'll share with many people, but I'll give some parts of the story. For almost 2 years now I've obsessed about the idea of having a girl. And I mean full out obsessed, it had taken over a large portion of my life and was highly unhealthy. It stressed me out to highly dangerous points. A few months ago I was sitting at the table looking at my kids and realized that even though I wanted a girl, I honestly didn't want more kids. I love the 3 adorable boys that we have. Things with Brettley have been a challenge. It's been more work and is kind of like having a first kid all over again. Because of this, when he reaches developmental milestones, it's highly exciting. I'd love to end it on that note, where it's all exciting and not a 'been there, done that' kind of a thing. So I talked to the counselor I was seeing about how I felt and that I felt like I had to have another baby because of blessings and answers to prayers, like I didn't really have a choice in the matter. Keep in mind, the counselor I see is through LDSFS, so he shares my spiritual beliefs. What he said changed my world. He told me that I still have agency in this. Basically, I have the option to have another kid, but that doesn't mean that I'm required to take that option. I am allowed to make this choice for myself. As soon as I decided that I was happy with what I have and was done, it was like the weight of the world was lifted off of my shoulders. I've been so much happier and less stressed since then. I no longer cry each time I pass little girl clothes in Walmart, I just appreciate if something is especially cute. Two days ago John loaded all of our old baby things into my mum's van for her to sell for us. It's gone, and it felt so liberating. I love John, our love our boys and I'm looking forward to growing together as a family of 5 geeks :) Life is great!

Sans Children and 9 Years

The boys went to my mum's place on Friday until Wednesday. They had a blast there. On Saturday I hosted a small baby shower for my friend who's having her baby this coming Monday. John took a whole bunch of stuff to the dump for me that day and cleared out a fair chunk in our basement. We played a lot of MTG that weekend because my back was hurting and laying down is pretty much the worst thing for that, so I didn't get a lot of sleep.

Monday John took the day off and we went out for the day. We saw a good friend that I haven't seen in a while. Then we went for lunch at The Old Spaghetti Factory. We shopped around West Ed for a while and went to a comic shop. It was a long and exhausting day. Tuesday I just hung around and relaxed.

Yesterday John took the day off again because I wasn't feeling well in the morning. I was also watching K yesterday. We took the 4 boys to a splash park since it was so hot out. We had a picnic lunch there and spent several hours playing. It was fun and we met up with some friends. Later Caleb and Ty enjoyed their early birthday presents from Grandpa. Caleb got a skateboard and Ty got a scooter. They are really enjoying them!

Today is L's birthday. She is now 9 and saying that makes me feel kind of old :P I love her birthday, it's such a celebration of everything to do with her. So happy 9th birthday to the most beautiful girl in the world. I love you so much!

Sick x4

Our last week has consisted of 4 out of 5 of us being sick. It started with Brettley and quickly moved on to me. I had several days of a sore throat, a sore body and feeling completely drained. A 30 minute shopping tripped knocked me out for hours. Caleb caught it next and had some nasty fevers and then Ty ended up with the same thing. Today is the first day in a week that we've all been (pretty much) healthy.

Not much else has been going on here, other than teaching the boys to do some new household tasks so that I can start passing some of the responsibility to them. Sorry, it's been an extremely boring week, but I should have more to say next week.

No Glasses For a While

We've done all the prep work to cancel our land line and it will be cut off on the 24th. I'm really looking forward to it being gone and excited to get my new phone case some time next week. The case I had keeps falling off of my 'new' phone.

Brettley had his surgery follow-up yesterday. His opthalmologist is very happy with how it went and has asked him to go without glasses for the next 3 months and then see how he's doing without them. That was very exciting news!

Caleb and Ty had a sleepover at Grandpa's house on Tuesday night. They love being there, riding bikes with him and eating Grandpa's cookies. I've tried buying them the cookies for at home but they prefer to keep them as a special thing at Grandpa's house.

We don't have a lot of plans for the long weekend, just hoping to hit a splash park on Saturday. Mostly we just want to relax :)

Good Bye Land Line...

The hard part about committing to blog or journal at regular intervals is that you sometimes ending up having no idea what to say. That's where I'm at today on the whole thing. The only big thing from the last week is that John and I decided to get rid of our land line and run solely on our cell phones. It will end up saving us at least $53 each month, which is really nice. However, in order to make this work, we need to physically switch cell phones with each other. John's plan has 10 favorite numbers and mine only has 5, but I'm the one that talks and texts with more people. Kind of an inconvenience to switch everything over, but it will so be worth it. I'm hoping to have everything switched and the land line cut off mid-August.

Oh, and it was John's birthday on Tuesday. We didn't do much, just had a dinner and dessert with his mom, since she was in town. He got some stuff that he's really happy with and he enjoyed his birthday a lot better than last year's (I think I was sick). I am so lucky to be his wife and I love him so much!

Yep, that's about all for today. Need to get some stuff done before K gets here to be babysat.

Weekend Sans Kids

Over the past few weeks I've been doing really well with getting back on track with housework and have even started exercising.

The boys went to my mum and step-dad's for the weekend, so John and I had the weekend to ourselves. We watched RED, finally, and really enjoyed it. Then on Saturday we spent the morning doing errands together and that evening we checked out a new gaming store. We had a lazy day on Sunday and I had a big nap, because I woke up at 4:30 am and wasn't able to get back to sleep. Insomnia sucks!

Monday my new calendar for the next school year came in the mail. I'm a huge geek and new calendar day is actually one of my favourite days of the year. It feels like starting things fresh again and I love it! I also did a thorough cleaning of my entrance hallway and closet. I've decided to pick one 'room' to focus on each month and this month was that.

The boys came home on Tuesday and since then I've been battling Brettley's swollen eye. It's the same eye he had surgery on, but the swelling isn't related to the surgery. Caleb had the same thing happen a few months ago and after a few days of Benadryl he was fine again. Brett's eye looked just horrible yesterday, but is definitely improved today. That's about all that's going on here.

Strabismus Surgery 2.0

Last Wednesday I started planning my best friend's baby shower. I've never planned one before and I've only been to 1 (my own, which was really casual), so it's been a big learning experience for me. I thrive on planning things, though, so that part is working out really well for me.

The 4 boys and I went to the park last Thursday, which we all really enjoyed. I don't watch K again until the 23rd or 24th, which I think makes the boys miss him a lot.

Friday mostly consisted of my allergies being REALLY bad. I have never ever had allergies as bad as this year and they normally only last a couple of weeks but I've now had them for a couple of months. It's kind of a big pain.  That morning Caleb told me that the Little Einsteins show was confused because percussive instruments aren't woodwinds, brass or strings. I didn't realize until then just how much interest he actually takes in music.

Our weekend pretty much consisted of getting everything ready for Brett's surgery. Caleb and Ty stayed at my dad's place on Sunday and Monday night. Brett's surgery itself went really well. He was all smiles for everyone that day, which I think was refreshing for the nurses, doctors, etc from the sounds of it. We left the hospital a lot earlier than we'd thought, and went and visited with a friend for a bit, while Brettley enjoyed having their play room to himself. That night he woke up crying at 2 am, so we put him in our bed on John's side and John decided to sleep on the floor (still not sure why). This is kind of a big deal in our family because I'm really firm on the whole not giving our kids permission to sleep in our bed unless they're REALLY sick thing. Anyway, he finally fell back asleep until he woke up at 5 am and proceeded to get sick no less than 8 times in the next 2 hours and 10 minutes before he finally stopped. The poor boy, he kept saying "all done" and you could tell he wanted more than anything for it to just stop. He napped for a couple of hours and then was fine and perky for the rest of the day. We're pretty sure it was a delayed reaction to the anesthetic and morphine he'd had the day before. His eye looks good though and I can tell that the surgery helped. I'm really hoping it's the last one, though.

Not a lot else is going on, the big news this week was the surgery and its after-effects. Now we're just getting things ready for the boys to spend a long weekend at Grandma and Grandpa's house.

Melatonin Works

This week's post is a day early since I'll be babysitting tomorrow for most of the day.

I went out for dinner with a friend of mine last Thursday at a burger joint called Soda Jerks. We were able to build our own burgers. It was really good, I'd definitely go there again on a calorie cheat day.

The boys let me sleep in on Friday, which I greatly enjoyed. I got a bunch of new songs with the iTunes money I earned and had my last regularly scheduled appointment with the psychologist I was working with. We were both really impressed with my progress and felt it was time to just check in every few months. That night we started Ty on melatonin. I never wanted to have to 'help' my kids sleep, but Ty was outlasting us almost every night and it was affecting pretty much all parts of his life. Since starting the melatonin he is asleep within an hour of taking it and is well rested the next day. His behavior has improved so much and I'm so grateful it was suggested to us. I suffer from insomnia, so he comes by sleep problems honestly.

Saturday we went to a birthday party for a family friend, which was held at a splash park. Caleb and Ty had a blast. Brettley wasn't so sure at first, but eventually ventured in and enjoyed it. I even let myself get the big bucket of water dumped on me twice! We had a lot of fun. That evening my brother and sister-in-law came over for supper and had a great visit with us. It was so awesome to see them, we'd really missed them.

Sunday the kids had their first Sunday with the Church Bag. I made up a backpack with stuff in it that they will only see on Sundays in sacrament meeting, like puzzles, church books and pictures, pipe cleaners, etc. Caleb and Ty did great with it and I'm really happy that I finally buckled down and did it.

Monday we didn't do very much, it was pretty warm. We did go to a BBQ at some friends' house to celebrate Canada Day and the boys really enjoyed it. I also found out that my mum and step-dad had needed to put the dog down on Friday. He was a great dog and kept me company a lot while I was pregnant with L, but he was old and very sick and it was time for him to go. The kids will miss him a lot, though.

Yesterday I had my first day of babysitting for the summer. K and Caleb got along really well, and K and Ty were already friends. It was record breaking hot yesterday, but we fared not too bad until around 4pm and then it got to the point where I had to give the kids cool baths and let them roam around the house in their underwear/diaper. My mum sent me a surprise parcel with a new lamp for my living room, which is pretty nice. It was a great surprise. We ended up with a big storm early in the night, which cooled things off really fast and was super amazing to watch. I love watching storms unless there's danger involved in watching them. Just really big hail this time (some were golf ball size).

So that's about all that's new at the Bly house. Brettley is down for his afternoon nap and I'm about to do the same :)

New Couches And Other Random Things

In my scripture study recently I've been studying the scripture mastery verses. It's been a fun experience and has given my study a focus rather than just forcing myself to get through a chapter each day.

I got to pick out my new couches over the weekend and John and my dad got rid of our old ones on Saturday. They were falling apart rapidly and hurt me if I tried to sit on them for longer than 30 minutes. My new ones came on Tuesday and we're all loving them. I think my mum was surprised that I got chocolate brown ones, because I always tell her she uses too much brown in her house. I actually like brown here and there, as long as there's other colours to help brighten things up. So that being said, my mum has ordered me new curtains for my living room that are a nice bright green and white that will look great with the brown and really brighten up the room.

3 of us have had pink eye over the last week (Caleb, Ty and I), but we're all in the clear now, thank goodness. Pink eye is horrible for me because I'm allergic to the drops. I suffered through them for 48 hours though to get rid of the infection.

We got our family photos on Sunday and I've used a few of them to update this site.

Brettley had his last pre-op appointment on Monday. I will be so glad after this surgery is done, and hopefully it'll be the last one. John also shampooed a bunch of my carpets that day since I'm not able to use the machine anymore with my back being so bad. I've been keeping my house really clean and that always makes me feel great.

I have now lost 10 lbs so far and earned $20 in iTunes money. I'm now working on the next 10 lbs to earn a book that's coming out in August that I've really been looking forward to.

Today is Caleb's last day of grade 1. I'm not sure if I'm excited for him to be home for the summer or not, and he told me this morning that he feels the same. He and I both thrive on routine, so Christmas, Spring and Summer break are all really hard for us. Hopefully it'll go well and we'll have a great summer.

Father's Day and Goings On

I don't even remember why I didn't blog last week, I just remember that something was up and I couldn't. I 'think' it's because I spent most of last week being super sick to my stomach for no apparent reason, but don't quote me on that. This week was a lot better health wise. We didn't do anything too big for Father's Day. John got his present early a couple of months ago. He'd REALLY wanted this miniature of a Balrog (fiery demon in the mines in Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring) that he can put together for a very long time, so I finally bought it for him as an early Father's Day and birthday present (it's about $75). We got him some cards, Caleb gave him stuff he made at school and Ty gave him a box for his tie clip that he made out of Popsicle sticks (I may have helped...).

In the way of exciting news, I've recently lost 4.6 lbs and am still going strong. John has offered to bribe me by buying me something every time I lose 10 lbs. My first prize will be an iTunes card, which I'm very excited to get.

Caleb is on his last field trip of the year today, next Thursday is his last day of grade 1. Ty got his preschool immunizations on Tuesday and got a milkshake with Daddy after. Brettley had his pre-op physical yesterday with his pediatrician. She told John that she's confident that Brettley's development will be caught up by the time he starts school, which was AMAZING news to hear.

I think that's about all that is new, though. Enjoy the first day of summer tomorrow!

Change of Plans

Brettley got his surgery date yesterday for his next eye surgery. It is on July 8th, and before then he still needs a physical done as well as a final measurements appointment, not to mention Ty's immunizations in there as well. Needing time off for all of the important appointments means that we won't have enough time to go to Magrath next month like we'd planned. We're a bit bummed about it, but also agree that it will help us in other aspects to not go, so it's pretty easy to accept.

Caleb had his piano recital on Saturday and did well. He really enjoyed it and looked so dapper in his suit and tie.

Ty has finally started being reverent during sharing time. It only took 17 months for that to kick in, ha ha. He's just so excited about everything all of the time and doesn't really know how to contain it, but I'm so happy to hear that he's getting better in sharing time.

Not too much else going on here. My burn is healing well and John's doing good. That's life this week in a nutshell.

Ouch and Ouch and Reading

I really hurt myself this week. On Monday I was making Rice Krispies squares for FHE. I was so proud of myself for actually making something instead of just buying something, because I'm not a "let's bake perfect treats and make perfect handouts every single week" kind of a mom. For me, if we manage to have any kind of lesson that week then it's a win. So I got everything mixed up in my large cooking pot and transferred it to my lasagna pan to cool. There were a couple of things in my right side sink, so I rested the pot between the two sinks while I cleared it out. I moved the pot into the sink and started running hot water into it. As I was adding dish soap to the pot, I made the genius mistake of resting my arm where the pot had just been resting for the past couple of minutes, and proceeded to receive my first 2nd degree burn. It's been a very painful few days. My burn is about 5 cm long and about 1 cm wide and got a really nasty blister. So for the time being, FHE treats will not require a stove, ha ha. It's Caleb's turn to pick the treat for next week anyway, and he picked Brown Cows (root beer and milk), so I'm good to go for that :)

I also read a new book. The Selection by Kiera Cass
I really enjoyed it, enough that I'm anxiously awaiting the sequel from the library. The sequel was just released last month, so once I've read it I'll have to wait quite a while for the next one. Anyway, reading the book I think to myself "I think I've read this story before in a few other books", but it's entertaining enough to keep me highly interested. I'd recommend it for a casual read.

Enjoying The Sun

We had family photos taken last Saturday by one of the young women in our ward. Her mom said she got some really cute ones, so I'm looking forward to seeing them soon and being able to update the pictures on here, since the kids have changed so much in the last year.

We've also been enjoying using the BBQ now that the weather is warmer out. We had a few days where it was abnormally hot for that time of the year. Days like that make me wish that it was normal for AC in houses here, but it's just not worth it for the small amount of unbearable heat that we get in a year. I am thinking that we might be spending some time in the basement this summer though. Guess I'd better get their little air hockey table set up down there.

Bretts has been absolutely loving the nice weather and would be outside 24/7 if he could. He is walking and running and jumping so well and his speech has improved so much. We are so happy with all of the progress he's made.

Ty is so excited for Kindergarten. We told him that he would start after Auntie Rachel has her baby (she's due near the end of August), so now every morning he asks if Auntie Rachel has had her baby yet. I think school is going to be a great thing for him, and I'm sure he'll be the class clown. He still has me in stitches so often.

Caleb is loving grade 1 and just adores reading. He stops to read signs and other every day things all of the time. Today is his track meet, which he was very excited about. He is also almost done his first year of piano. He has learned so much and is really enjoying it. He has decided that he really wants to take it again next year, which I'm more than happy to do.

Not a lot else going on here at the moment, though. I just made a goal to start blogging once per week again, so I'm hoping Thursdays will be that day for me each week.

A Proper Update

Okay, I hide A LOT from my facebook about what's really going on with me, because not everyone on facebook needs to know everything about me. However, I made myself a promise a few years ago that I would be honest on my blog. Or, at least more honest than I am on facebook. There is a really good reason why I've been all but absent since October. I started seeing a psychologist, who is LDS and the first one that I've been able to easily work with. I started confronting the mental/emotional abuse I went through as a kid and the serious lasting effects it's had on my self-esteem and perception of my self-worth. It's been an incredibly emotional time for me learning just how much this has affected me and realizing just how much work will be involved in trying to fix the damage that it did.

Also, if I'm being truly honest here, I've really been struggling since the calling change. I miss Young Women a lot and it was something that kept me sane when nothing else would, so it was very hard to be released from that during such an emotional time. However, I am (very) slowly working through it. The Cubs are great boys, and that helps so much.

So there you have it, the reason I rarely post on my blog any more. I do have great support from my husband and my friend who first convinced me to go see someone. It's not all been bad, it's just been highly emotional. Mostly, it's just nice to finally feel like I'm dealing with the problem after 20 years. So if you don't hear from me often, it's not because I have nothing to say or I'm not fine, it's because I have a lot that I'm dealing with and the specific details of it aren't something I'm comfortable sharing in this setting.

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That being said, here's some updates for you. Caleb is home for spring break this week. He did quite well on his report card last week. He has been enjoying piano lessons (I think) and his teacher is always impressed with him. I'd love for him to keep it up, but he insists that he'd rather swim or learn guitar next year. Guess it will be swimming, because the deal with guitar was that he had to take 2 years of piano first.

Ty is his usual random self and keeps me quite entertained. We are both looking forward to him starting school in September. He's become quite proficient in using the TV, the computer and my iPhone. Sometimes I think it's bad that he's so good at it, but I think it's mostly a combination of his way of channeling his intelligence and it just being a generational thing. Especially my iPhone, since he normally only gets to use it if we're out at an appointment or something, which is very rare. Next month we get to go to his Kindergarten open house. Should be fun!

Brettley will be having another surgery in the near future for his eyes. The doctor said they could keep doing them until he's 7 as long as they're needed, but I'm pretty sure we'll stop after this one. His eyes improved drastically after the first surgery and he should end up looking pretty normal after this one, so I'd rather not do this to him again after this one if I can help it. He is catching up in his development. He can walk well, run and jump. He has hugely expanded his vocabulary and communicates quite a bit. He is very polite, using please and thank you a lot. It was such a relief to see and hear these changes in him and I'm not nearly as worried about this being a permanent issue anymore.

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Well, that's about it for now. I hope everyone enjoys their Easter this weekend.

When You Look At The Bishopric Member Like He's Crazy

It's been almost 2 months. Do I have an excuse? Not really. I just seem to never have anything to blog about. Except for my calling change. I discovered how much it sucks when you love your calling with an intense passion and then figure out that a release is coming but aren't sure of the when. The when ended up lasting about 3 weeks. I found out the last Sunday in February, and that first week before it was announced in sacrament meeting I was able to conveniently ignore it because I was still going to mutual and still had a Sunday left with the girls. Reality hit on Sunday as I held one of the Beehives while she cried. It was a tough few days for me at the beginning of the week. However, the sister that is now the current 2nd counselor is the exact person that I was hoping would be called to it, so I know that the girls are in great hands and that they'll have a wonderful experience with their new leadership.

I am now the Assistant Cub Leader. When the bishopric member called me to serve as that I kind of dropped my jaw, bugged my eyes out of my head and with an incredulous voice went "Really?!?". I think I was still in shock at that point too, being released was (for the first time) an incredibly emotional experience and I was bawling. I was very happy to find out that they new leader shirts are red now, though, instead of the tan that they used to be. I'm going to pick mine up this Saturday and I get to go to my first Cub meeting on Tuesday. I'm learning to be excited for my calling and the preparation it will give me for when Caleb turns 8 next year (say what?!?).

So yeah, that's what's going down. I lead such a boring life, ha ha.

Christmas 2012

Christmas vacation hadn't gone particularly well for me the past 3 years, so I was kind of nervous to see how this one would turn out. For the most part it was great. I am 100% converted to Christmas in our own home. from now on. However, spending part of Christmas night in the ER wasn't on my to-do list. I'd been battling back pain for most of Christmas Day and by night time I couldn't even lay down for longer than 2 minutes before it hurt too bad and I had to sit up or something. I hadn't slept the night before thanks to my insomnia, so I knew I needed to get some sleep. Ibuprofin and a heating pad weren't making a dent in the pain, so we called up my dad and he came and stayed with the kids while we went to the ER. I apparently strained my rhomboid muscle really badly, so they gave me a shot of a stronger anti-inflammatory and sent me home, after telling me that recovery could take weeks and possibly require physiotherapy. So most of our Christmas break was spent with me doing a whole load of nothing other than popping Motrin like it's candy and changing my position every 5-10 minutes. That being said, it was still the best Christmas that I'd had in a few years. I loved being at home and being on our own schedule. The kids really enjoyed time with Daddy. They weren't big on a nice Christmas dinner, though, so I'm going to do something a lot more basic for Christmas 2013.

There's a lot to look ahead to this year such as ward YW camp, Ty starting Kindergarten and whatever else may come our way. For the moment I'm just enjoying the fact that Brettley loves the switch to the toddler bed and the boys are loving the fact that they have a play room right now.