Our Easter Weekend

Thursday night my tub started leaking through my dining room ceiling. It completely ruined a craft I was working on from Relief Society. It was kind of the last straw. We're officially house hunting now. It's sad because we'll have to pull out our RRSP to make it happen, PLUS, there's pretty much no hope of getting a place in Caleb's school boundaries and even staying in the ward might be tricky (not that it's a huge issue, I'm cool with leaving the ward if it's to move to the right place for us).

On Friday we travelled down to Magrath. The boys did very well during the trip. We had a surprise birthday party for my youngest SIL (who is still older than me). It was a good weekend and I got to have a really good talk with my father-in-law. He is the best father-in-law that there is:)

Our trip home was far more eventful than the one down. Yesterday we got out of Magrath later than we'd hoped driving Dad's van (one of our brake drums or something needs to be fixed this week). We just had Ty and Brett, Caleb is staying with my in-laws for the week while my SIL's kids have their Easter break. We hit Calgary during rush hour (there's a lot to be said for avoiding Calgary while travelling between Magrath and Edmonton, I think). While we were stopped in traffic the car behind us was rear ended, and then they rear ended us. It was really my first accident. The van was fine (thank goodness, since it wasn't even ours), but we waited for the officer to show up anyway, just in case (also, to get the case number). It put us behind by quite a bit though. I have decided that we're officially going to avoid Calgary from now on if we have to travel through during rush hour. Of all the times we drive in Edmonton during rush hour and have never been in any kind of an accident, it ended up happening in Calgary. I'm just grateful that about 10 minutes before it happened I remembered that we hadn't prayed before we left Magrath so I prayed right then that we would get home safely. We did, and maybe it would have been a lot worse if I hadn't remembered to pray for that.
(I think Calgary drivers leave significantly less space between vehicles than we do in Edmonton, which is incredibly stupid if you ask me)

Anyway, we got home safe last night and were happy to be back in our own beds. Today Ty and I are going to clean the house and start cleaning the backyard. I hope you had a wonderful Easter weekend and are enjoying the appearance the spring has FINALLY decided to make.

The Real Meaning of Easter

I went to an amazing Relief Society meeting last night. The theme was "Come Unto Christ". Did you know that's an LDS term? It isn't used at all in the Bible, but is one of the last verses of the Book of Mormon.
"Yea, come unto Christ, and be perfected in him, and deny yourselves of all ungodliness; and if ye shall deny yourselves of all ungodliness, and love God with all your might, mind and strength, then is his grace sufficient for you, that by his grace ye may be perfect in Christ; and if by the grace of God ye are perfect in Christ, ye can in nowise deny the power of God." - Moroni 10:32

One of the things that was brought up that I have really pondered on since hearing it is why we spend 6+ weeks every year celebrating the birth of the Savior (not even on his birthday, mind you), yet we are lucky if half of our Easter Sunday is spent celebrating the Risen Lord. Without Easter, we wouldn't have Christmas. It would be the equivalent of celebrating my birthday for 6 weeks (not that I'd complain, ha ha). However, if the events that we celebrate at Easter time hadn't occurred, Christmas would mean absolutely nothing. If Christ hadn't suffered in Gethsemane, been crucified on Golgotha and risen from death then we would have no hope beyond this life.

Because of this renewed passion for Easter, we are making some changes in our house. This year the Easter Bunny came a few weeks early. Next year he won't come at all. Instead we will do an egg hunt in darkness to remember the 3 days of darkness in the Americas after Christ was crucified. I have several activities to do with the kids in the 2 weeks before Easter and I will be doing the 14 Day Walk With Christ (found it on sugardoodle in the Easter Ideas section). I also have a goal to read Jesus The Christ by James E Talmage by next Easter.

Since my next few days are going to be busy, I wanted to share my testimony right now while I'm thinking about it.

I KNOW THAT MY SAVIOR LIVES AND THAT HE LOVES ME!!! I can't say this enough. I know that He was born in the most humble of circumstances, that He lived a perfect life being the perfect example. I know that as He took upon Himself the sins of the world in Gethsemane and bled from every pore that He felt every single pain that I've ever gone through or will go through. He understands me like no one else can. He suffered a death that was perfected to be disgustingly painful in order to satisfy a mob. However, the most miraculous part of it all is that on the third day He broke the bonds of death and was resurrected. I know that because He lives that I will be resurrected as well and that because He took my sins upon Himself that I have a chance to return to my Heavenly Father again someday. I know these things with every single part of me and I wish I could scream it to the world because it's the most amazing thing. I know that Jesus lives, I know that He loves me and I love Him.

Caleb

I didn't write yesterday because Brett has croup and it was REALLY bad yesterday. Lots better today. Plus, I didn't have a lot to talk about either. However, I wanted to write down a conversation I had with Caleb today so that I don't forget it.

Caleb "Mommy, can I be your Wubbie forever and ever and ever?"
Me "Yep, just like if you do the things that Heavenly Father tells you to you can live with Him forever and ever and ever, too."
*Short pause*
Caleb sighs and says in an exhausted voice "Oh man. Can we please take the van there instead?"

He must have thought that we were going to take a walk to see Heavenly Father that would last forever and ever and ever. I laughed so hard.

PS
Wubbie is one of his many nicknames.

Attitude of Gratitude

1) I am grateful that returning to my calling last night went easier than I thought that it would. I was mostly just a spectator last night, but I got some time to cuddle with my niece, so I loved that. We've enjoyed cuddles from day one of my joining the family. Here's some proof:















2) I am grateful that we're going to Magrath for Easter weekend. It will be Brettley's first big car ride. Caleb is so excited to see his cousin, Paul. I'm just looking forward to getting out of my house for a few days.

3) I am grateful that Brett did so well with his shots on Tuesday. Yes, I immunize my children. No, I don't want to debate about it. He cried for just a moment. Caleb gave him a kiss on the head and he calmed right down. It was a very sweet moment to watch.

***

Also, I got to buy new church shoes yesterday. My old ones were toast and I can't justify wearing winter boots to church in April, regardless of how cute some of them look. Now I just need to find a pair of flip flops to replace the ones I had to throw out. I tried on a few pairs last night, but none of them felt right.

I guess that's about all for now. Hope you have a great weekend!

Nightmares, Moving and Brettley

The first thing I decided to blog about today is my nightmares. My Saturday night was full of them, one after another and resulted in my not going to church on Sunday because I was so tired from them. When I have nightmares, they aren't about monsters or anything like that. They are about bad things happening to people that I love. For example, my last one was about my mum calling me to tell me that my grandfather was dying. The worst part is that I know exactly what triggered all of the nightmares. I've been thinking a lot lately about a man who is very important to me. He is dying of inoperable pancreatic cancer. The most anyone can buy him is 3-5 years, and we don't even know if that option is available yet. He is currently undergoing a light form of chemotherapy to see if they can shrink the cancer at all. It will not get rid of it, they are just hoping to buy him a bit more time. I have been dealing with this since November and haven't written about it online at all, except on my private blog, because he has told us that he doesn't want it plastered all over Facebook, so PLEASE take that request to heart if I have you on my Facebook. The man I'm talking about is my father-in-law. I'm closer to him than any other father figure in my life and I've never dealt with anyone close to me dying before. My dad's parents died before I was born and my mum's parents are still alive. My father-in-law is not expected to outlive them. It's heartbreaking. I've been thinking and worrying a lot about it lately, and that's what triggered the nightmares. I love him so much and it has been a really hard few months.

Also, if you have me on Facebook, you know that John and I are are beginning to begin to prepare to move. As in, we don't have a place even in mind yet, but we know we want to move and are going to start saving for it and going through our things and whittling the amount down to a quantity that we're willing to pack up when the time comes. I have yet to decide if we want to try and stay in our ward or not. I'm thinking we might purposely try to leave when the time comes. There are a few reasons, the first being that I'd like to be in a ward with none of our family there (John's sister is in our current ward). Also, we live in a very transient ward and it seems like most of the time that I start becoming decent friends with someone that they move shortly after. The third is that I am ready to develop some close friendships. I realize I have people that I get along okay with, but I don't have any close friends on this continent. It sucks. I don't have people that call me to hang out unless several other people are coming as well, I don't have someone I could call at the drop of a hat to ask them to come over and hang out if I'm having a tough day and if I did call, I don't have anyone who would come. I'm not trying to be a whiner or anything, I'm just ready to be in a place where I can work on that in a ward that's not super transient. Plus, most people in our current ward remember me at my worst, and I'd like to move forward from that.

Saturday evening I had a few people over for Brettley's "Meet The Baby" party. It was fun, even though Caleb kept coming down and being a turkey. Today Brettley is only supposed to be a week and a half old. However, he's actually 2 months old and doing great. We love him so much and are so proud of him. Speaking of Brettley, I'm pretty sure that he's hungry and Caleb wants to watch The Lightning Thief with me, so I'd better go. I hope you all had a wonderful weekend.

PS
Just thought I'd add that the reason I'd like to be in a ward with no family is not an issue with my sister-in-law. I'd just like to feel like my ward is my ward and not someone else's ward that I just happen to be in as well. I hope that makes sense.

Attitude of Gratitude and Farewell

1) I am grateful for the gum boots and splash pants & jackets that we bought the boys on the weekend. They are so much easier to put on than the snow suits, not as bulky and I don't have to let them spend forever drying in the sun if they get wet. We have had quite a chunk of snow melt and it's a very nice and welcome change.

2) I am grateful for the Booster Juice that John bought for me yesterday. It was a really rough day and a horrible evening. For the first time in months and months, the boys decided to 'decorate' their room in 'brown'. So I spent my entire evening scrubbing the walls, bed frame, mattress and toys as well as steam cleaning their carpet. The Booster Juice did a lot for my mood and I really appreciated it.

3) I am grateful that Caleb got to go and see his Kindergarten classroom on Tuesday and that he likes it so much. He's very excited to go to school. He has been asking to go since he was 2. I definitely don't think he'll have many tears on the first day of school.

On a sad note, I had to throw my beloved flip flops in the garbage last night. I was wearing them while I was cleaning up the boys' 'mess' and they were just gross by the time I was done, so I had to suck it up and just chuck them. I don't know if anyone remembers the story about the flip flops, but they are the first pair I've owned since I was VERY VERY young and I absolutely loved them and wore them everywhere except church for the last 2 springs and summers. I will miss them very much.

Books, General Conference And A Rant

I have a confession to make. I love reading self improvement books put out by Latter-day Saint authors. My favorite ones are by Merrilee Boyack. I found books in the Time Out For Women Store that I want to buy. They are:
Wake Up To A Happier Life: Finding Joy in the Work You Do Every Day by Amanda Dickson
In Trying Times, Just Keep Trying! by Merrilee Browne Boyack
I Hate It When Exercise Is The Answer: A Fitness Program For The Soul by Emily Watts
5 Spiritual Solutions for Everyday Parenting Challenges by Linda J Eyre & Richard M Eyre

I feel like these types of books help keep me motivated to work on the things that I need to work on. I love that feeling, and I especially get it when I'm watching General Conference. I enjoy spending 2 weekends a year hearing the leaders of the church speaking to us about the things that we need to know for our time. It was an amazing Conference this past weekend and I'm so much looking forward to studying the talks over the next 6 months until the next General Conference.

Over the weekend I kind of had a rant that I feel compelled to share a bit on my blog, since John agreed with me that it's a huge issue that needs awareness. I was reading that someone I know ended up having to stop breastfeeding and switch to using a bottle for a very good reason. Just over 4 1/2 years ago I went through that as well. We were never able to get Caleb to latch and he was starving. I had to make a choice. I chose to not let my son starve. Yet, there are so many women out there who treat us mothers who have to choose to bottle feed for whatever reason like we should be put in front of a firing squad for not breastfeeding our children. Seriously!?! It's disgusting how self righteous and judgmental these women can be. I wanted to nurse my children, but I can't. My body will not cooperate and I tried several different things to try to make it work. None of them did. So instead of letting my children starve to death trying for weeks on end to make this work while stressing myself out to the absolute max, I chose to give them the next best thing in order to save the health of both of us. How on earth does that make me a bad mother? I know that breast milk is better, but I didn't have that option (pumping wouldn't work for me either). We rarely know why people make the choices for their family that they do, and it is not our place to judge them for it. I think that's a valuable lesson. Okay, I'm stepping off of my soapbox now.

Anyway, I hope you all had a wonderful weekend. Other than my 15 minute rant, mine was great!